Tag Archives: bake and destroy

Apple Crisp Cupcakes

So, you know how some people are like, “Oh, hey, I meant to call you but I’ve been busy…”? Well, I am probably one of the only people you’ll ever meet in your life who IS genuinely busy. And uh, yeah, I meant to call you, he he.

But seriously, I just started school full time, I work part time, and I have one toddler and two teenagers who I have to drive here, there, and everywhere, otherwise I’m made to feel like an a-hole. This is the reason I all but stopped my side baking business with an exception now and again- like today.

It’s Superbowl Sunday! I have to work and I’m bringing in these delicious apple crisp cupcakes. The recipe is pretty basic- take the vanilla cupcake recipe from Vegan Cupcakes Take Over the World and cross it with the Apple Crisp Cupcake from Julie Hasson’s 125 Best Cupcake Recipes. Totally vegan and totally delicious! Simply add 1 cup of peeled, chopped apple to the batter of the vegan vanilla cupcake. Then make this streusel…

Streusel:

3/4 cup brown sugar

3 Tbsp Earth Balance

1 tsp cinnamon

pinch salt

Mix together until you have coarse, wet crumbs. Fill your lined muffin cups half way with the batter. Place a dollop of the streusel mixture in the center then fill to the top with more batter. Bake at 350 for about 26 minutes, possibly more, if your oven sucks. Let cool completely. Yes, they will be very sticky and gooey but seriously, if anyone actually complains about this, remove the cupcake from their hand, toss it in the trash and say “There. Not so sticky now, is it!?”

Apple Crisp Cupcakes

Oh and I tried to download the cupcake toppers my friend Natalie posted in her blog but I have this new-ish printer that apparently doesn’t have magenta ink, thus being the reason why it was given to me, i guess. Alas, no toppers.

Enjoy these!!

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Filed under baking, cupcake, dessert, messy, vegan

Food and Politics

So, I entered into the Iron Cupcake: Earth challenge and having looked at all the entries, I kind of wish I had done something a little more creative. Mine was the lamest of the lame. But on a happier note, I already have two of the three prizes being offered so I’m not going to cry into my pillow or anything. However, for this month’s challenge- basil- I’m fully prepared to rock your socks. Just you wait.

Coffee buzz energy bars

Coffee buzz energy bars

Last night while looking through my Flickr friends uploads, I happened upon Hannah Kaminsky’s pics and she had a link for a downloadable recipe booklet called “Lunchbox Bites.” For five dollars you get 12 printable vegan snack food recipes for your kids or yourself or whatever. Of course I bought it, started downloading and before I even had the whole thing printed up, made the “Coffee Buzz Energy Bars.” I love coffee. They were good but I think next time I’m going to add in some toasted almonds because that’s how I roll, yo. Out of all the recipes, the only one I will never ever make is the “Rootbeer Pudding.” This one seems like it will trigger my gag reflex without ever having come near my mouth. I hate rootbeer. But all in all, a good buy. I’m going to make everything else, even the cinnamon swirl bread, and I hate making bread.

Lemon Garlic Pasta

Lemon Garlic Pasta

I made this amazing pasta last week. After being on vacation for a week and not being in my own kitchen and not being able to cook, i was jonesing for some home-cooked vegan fare. Maine isn’t exactly a Mecca for vegetarians, with their endless barrage of signs advertising giant lobster rolls or lobster dinners for $11 or $12. The recipe is from “Eat, Drink, and Be Vegan” by Dreena Burton. I made my own tweaks, as noted.

1 lb brown rice pasta (recipe calls for 3/4 lb of whatever pasta you like)

1/3 cup lemon juice (I used the stuff in the bottle, the recipe calls for fresh squeezed)

5 large garlic cloves (recipe says 2, suckas! But I love me some garlic)

1/3 cup capers (okay the recipe didn’t have this, i added it on my own. Super!! Makes it more like a piccata and that’s allright by me.)

1 1/2 tsp agave nectar

1/2 tsp dijon mustard

1/4 cup Olive oil

1/3 cup toasted walnuts (recipe says pine nuts, but those things aren’t cheap and I am)

3 tsp chopped basil (i used the frozen cubes that Trader Joe has. I love them. The recipe says 1/3 cup chopped fresh that you add at the end but I don’t follow directions well, i guess)

Cook pasta, reserving 1 cup of the pasta water. In a bowl mix all the ingredients together, then toss it into your pasta. If the pasta seems too dry, as mine did, add some pasta water. I used most of it because that brown rice stuff gets very sticky. I used my Parma! vegan parmesan cheese as a topper and away i went. This was so t angy and refreshing, i would highly recommend making it. At the very least, buy the cookbook, cheapo. She has some great stuff in there.

Jesus-y Lip Gloss- front

Jesus-y Lip Gloss- front

While in Maine, Robert decided to pick me up some Jesus-y lip gloss. Good for you, Robert! Keep pissing off the right wing pricks that started screwing up our country almost 8 years ago! Here is some of the stuff that it says on the package: (did you just giggle when I said package? Me too. Ahem.)

Be worthy, be noticed

Get tight with Christ!

The flavor is called “virtuous vanilla”

Look your Sunday best

Return lips to near virgin quality!

Jesus-y Lip Gloss- back

Jesus-y Lip Gloss- back

So you see why he had to pick this up for me. It’s effing hilarious. I love anything that makes fun of religion or just god in general. Or the elderly, the handicapped, the poor, the fat, pretty much anyone. I’ll make fun of anyone. If you irritate me, I’ll make fun of you too so piss off.

Oh, I also made these enchiladas. Super easy. You would have to have no arms and be blind in order for you to NOT be able to make this. Seriously.

2 cans black beans, drained and rinsed

1 can corn, drained and rinsed

1 can ro-tel diced tomatoes with green chiles (or other brand)

1 giant can red enchilada sauce

1 package (giggle) corn tortillas

2 0r 3 cups of shredded vegan cheese

Black Bean and Corn Enchiladas

Black Bean and Corn Enchiladas

Mix the beans, corn, and tomatoes together in a bowl. Spoon into tortillas,  then roll ’em up like burritos (or just fold over) and lay in baking dish. Pour enchilada sauce over the top, sprinkle with cheese, bake for 35 minutes at 400 or until cheese is melted. Hopefully you got the vegan cheese that melts, that other stuff is goopy and wierd.

These were a little spicy but a lot yummy! I made big dish of these and we still have half the pan leftover for tonight. I win! Now, if you can find cheap vegan cheese or buy it when it goes on sale, this is a fairly inexpensive dish to make and it feeds a lot. And it’s moderately healthy because of the beans and corn. I mean, there are worse things you could eat, like dead flesh.

Obama cupcake toppers

Obama cupcake toppers

One last note, we have an election coming up and I want you to think really hard about who you are voting for. My friend Natalie at Bake and Destroy has made Obama cupcake toppers that you may download for free. I did it last night. On her etsy shop, she is selling ‘special’ cupcake toppers in honor of that giant anti-choice idiot Sarah Palin. Here’s what Natalie thinks of McCain. I think it’s fucking hilarious so now you get to laugh also: “I would elect a Satanist over McCain. (In my dreams, I know.) I would elect a baby-sacrificing goat over him. Oh wait, that’s his running mate. I would elect someone who worshiped balloons. My vote would go to a bowl of jellybeans before it went to that war-mongering walking corpse.” She also referred to him as MummRa, which made me almost pee myself. If you are a complete moron and you vote for McCain because he has a woman running mate and you’re “all about women’s rights,” think again. Here are some things you should know about Sarah Palin (and McCain):

Last week was John McCain’s 72nd birthday. If elected, he’d be the oldest president ever inaugurated. And after months of slamming Barack Obama for “inexperience,” here’s who John McCain has chosen to be one heartbeat away from the presidency: a right-wing religious conservative with no foreign policy experience, who until recently was mayor of a town of 9,000 people.

Huh?

Who is Sarah Palin? Here’s some basic background:

* She was elected Alaska’s governor a little over a year and a half ago. Her previous office was mayor of Wasilla, a small town outside Anchorage. She has no foreign policy experience.

* Palin is strongly anti-choice, opposing abortion even in the case of rape or incest.

* She supported right-wing extremist Pat Buchanan for president in 2000.

* Palin thinks creationism should be taught in public schools.

* She’s doesn’t think humans are the cause of climate change.

* She’s solidly in line with John McCain’s “Big Oil first” energy policy. She’s pushed hard for more oil drilling and says renewables won’t be ready for years. She also sued the Bush administration for listing polar bears as an endangered species—she was worried it would interfere with more oil drilling in Alaska.

* How closely did John McCain get this choice? He met Sarah Palin once at a meeting. They spoke a second time, last Sunday, when he called her about being vice-president. Then he offered her the position.

This is information the American people need to see. Please take a moment to forward this to your friends and family.

Also, Alaska MoveOn members were asked what the rest of us should know about their governor. The response was striking.

Here’s a sample:

She is really just a mayor from a small town outside Anchorage who has been a governor for only 1.5 years, and has ZERO national and international experience. I shudder to think that she could be the person taking that 3AM call on the White House hotline, and the one who could potentially be charged with leading the US in the volatile international scene that exists today. —Rose
M., Fairbanks, AK

She is VERY, VERY conservative, and far from perfect. She’s a hunter and fisherwoman, but votes against the environment again and again. She ran on ethics reform, but is currently under investigation for several charges involving hiring and firing of state officials. She has NO experience beyond Alaska. —Christine
B., Denali Park, AK

As an Alaskan and a feminist, I am beyond words at this announcement. Palin is not a feminist, and she is not the reformer she claims to be. —Kare
n L., Anchorage, AK

Alaskans, collectively, are just as stunned as the rest of the nation. She is doing well running our State, but is totally inexperienced on the national level, and very much unequipped to run the nation, if it came to that. She is as far right as one can get, which has already been communicated on the news. In our office of thirty employees (dems, republicans, and nonpartisans), not one person feels she is ready for the V.P. position.—Sher
ry C., Anchorage, AK

She’s vehemently anti-choice and doesn’t care about protecting our natural resources, even though she has worked as a fisherman. McCain chose her to pick up the Hillary voters, but Palin is no Hillary. —Marina L.
, Juneau, AK

I think she’s far too inexperienced to be in this position. I’m all for a woman in the White House, but not one who hasn’t done anything to deserve it. There are far many other women who have worked their way up and have much more experience that would have been better choices. This is a patronizing decision on John McCain’s part- and insulting to females everywhere that he would assume he’ll get our vote by putting “A Woman” in that position.—Jenn
ifer M., Anchorage, AK

So Governor Palin is a staunch anti-choice religious conservative. She’s a global warming denier who shares John McCain’s commitment to Big Oil. And she’s dramatically inexperienced.

In picking Sarah Palin, John McCain has made the religious right very happy. And he’s made a very dangerous decision for our country.

In the next few days, many Americans will be wondering what McCain’s vice-presidential choice means. Please pass this information along to your friends and family.

Sources:

1.”Sarah Palin,” Wikipedia, Accessed August 29, 2008http://en
.wikip
edia.org/wiki/Sarah_Palin

2.”McCain Selects Anti-Choice Sarah Palin as Running Mate,” NARAL Pro-Choice America, August 29, 2008
http://www
.moveo
n.org/r?r=17515&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=1

3.”Sarah Palin, Buchananite,” The Nation, August 29, 2008http://www
.moveo
n.org/r?r=17736&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=2

4.”‘Creation science’ enters the race,” Anchorage Daily News, October 27, 2006http://www
.moveon.
org/r?r=17737&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=3

5.”Palin buys climate denial PR spin—ignores science,” Huffington Post, August 29, 2008http://www.
moveo
n.org/r?r=17517&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=4

6.”McCain VP Pick Completes Shift to Bush Energy Policy,” Sierra Club, August 29, 2008http://www.
moveo
n.org/r?r=17518&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=5

“Choice of Palin Promises Failed Energy Policies of the Past,” League of Conservation Voters, August 29, 2008http://www
.moveo
n.org/r?r=17519&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=6

“Protecting polar bears gets in way of drilling for oil, says governor,” The Times of London, May 23, 2008
http://www
.moveo
n.org/r?r=17520&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=7

7 “McCain met Palin once before yesterday,” MSNBC, August 29, 2008
http://www
.moveo
n.org/r?r=21119&id=13661-5826486-HGvt6Gx&t=8

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Cosmo’s Vegan Shoppe Booty

Teese mozzarella, Parma! vegan parmesan cheese, Temptation vegan ice cream, vegan vanilla marshmallows

Teese mozzarella, Parma! vegan parmesan cheese, Temptation vegan ice cream, vegan vanilla marshmallows

Gotta love that booty.

For a long time I have been hearing about this thing called ‘Teese,’ a vegan mozzarella cheese from Chicago Soy Dairy. Mind you, the factory is only an hour away but if I want the stuff, I have to order it from someplace about 1000 miles away. Enter Cosmo’s Vegan shoppe based in Atlanta, Georia.

Obviously vegan, they pledge to only sell vegan products, made on dedicated vegan equipment. Good for them. So, not only did I get the Teese, I also got yummy vanilla marshmallows by Sweet and Sara, Temptation vegan ice cream in chocolate, and Parma!, a vegan parmesan cheese.

The parmesan cheese has only walnuts, nutritional yeast, salt, and love in the ingredients so the jury’s still out on that one. The marshmallows are absolutely awesome and I think next time I will order the coconut ones also. A friend has just informed me that I need to try them toasted so that’s my first order of business when Olivia gets up from her nap. Regarding the ice cream mix, I do appreciate not having to heat anything to boiling and then letting it cool completely before putting it in the Cuisinart, that’s for sure. However, all I had at the time to make the ice cream was almond milk which seems to have given a strange flavor, but I will order it again and this time throw in some peanut butter or something. They have a website on the bag where you can go to get recipes. Sounds good to me!! All that was left try was the Teese.

When you order it, Cosmo’s suggests that you purchase an ice pack or two to keep cold in transit, since it is a perishable, refrigerated item. I bought one. When my package arrived, the cheese was room temperature and the ice pack was completely melted. Chicago Soy Dairy, why can’t you just open a store for me to shop at? Why? Gah, anyway.

My best friend and I had just had a conversation about how badly we miss cheese pizza since going vegan a few months back. Now of course we have no intention of cheating, especially after we both watched Earthlings, we know we are doing the right thing. But as soon as he said it, ding!, a light went on in my brain that made me think of Teese, just because I keep seeing ads for it and stuff. I just happened to have frozen bread dough so I thawed it out. I had no pizza sauce so I had to bust out my jar of Newman’s tomato basil marinara sauce. I sliced the Teese, instead of pinching off little portions like I had seen others do, thinking it was just going to melt and get all oozey anyways. I topped it with a boatload of oregano and basil. While it was cooking, the kids said it smelled like a pizza parlor in our house.

And to the right is what it looked like coming out of the oven. The Teese was a little melted but still retained a weird skin on top. Robert and the kids loved it and thought it was fab. I was a little less impressed. I have seen pictures of other people’s Teese pizzas that looked phenomenal so I’m thinking mine got below the temp it was supposed to be kept at and that changed it somehow. It was still tasty, but I guess I was hoping to be wowed and I wasn’t. I have every intention of trying it again, though. I’m going to switch up the crust a bit, I think that had a lot to do with my not totally loving it.

Also, I came up with a fabulous idea for my Iron Cupcake entry while perusing the internet looking for different pepper jellies. I found one that sounded almost edible and instantly came up with a picture in my head of what I was going to make. Now I just have to wait for Mr. UPS to bring it to me. Oh, I wasn’t being sexist there, my UPS guy is really a guy.

Now, if only I could come up with something for Sugar Slam….

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A Little Post About Bags…

First, i would like to say that I am not really a tree hugger. I’m what you call a poser. When it’s convenient for me, I’ll do whatever you ask as far as recycling or whatever. But honestly, we drive an SUV. And the worst kind, too. It’s an H3. Barf. Now, don’t get too excited, it was a lease. Anyone can get a lease. Even us broke folk. But regardless, from the second he brought it home, i was embarrassed. I think they’re ugly. They use way too much gas. Plus, they aren’t all that good for hauling stuff. There’s no hitch and that back door opens to the side. Not downwards like every other truck on the planet. What’s the point?

Oh, and there are certain things i get nasty about, I’m not gonna lie. If I’m in a restaurant with friends and one even thinks about ordering the veal, i go through my rundown about baby cows. I did this even when i happily ate the baby cows mama as my own dinner. I just happen to think treatment of baby cows for this purpose is unacceptable. Same thing with goose liver pate. I would love to do the same thing to some jackass that’s done to those geese. But i would gladly eat Mother Goose’s cousin, el pollo. Get what I’m saying? Total poser.

I stopped eating meat and am currently cleaning out my fridge of most animal products. Except for the stuff my hubby eats. He refuses to go veg. Whatever, that’s his choice and I’m not going to be a sterotypical vegan asshole about it.

But this bag thing…it’s got me bummed. I ordered cloth grocery bags from Bake And Destroy and I love them so i leave them in my car because I’m a forgetful moron, and i often have to stop for crap like paper clips, or diapers. When i do, my local chain grocer employees look at me like I just asked them to wear a leopard thong and grease up. No, really, it’s getting ridiculous. I go into the bag-the-damn-stuff-yourself lane and one of the workers came over to help in an effort to hurry me out of there. The first thing she did was open up a plastic bag. I very quickly-and shortly- told her i brought my own bags and I will do it myself. Cue the eye roll, please. Grrr…. I wrote a letter to Jewel, yes, Jewel, or Albertson’s to all you westerners, and i got some very generic form letter back. Jerks.

To all of you reading this…if you’re not going to buy the bags Jewel sells for a dollar a piece then please please please make sure you are recycling those plastic bags. Each Jewel has a giant box posted by the front door for this purpose. Use it! Good karma will follow you everywhere, i swear!

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