Tag Archives: brat

Adventures in baby-ing

olivia outsideI can’t refer to hanging out with my child as babysitting, it’s ignorant and just plain wrong, so i call it ‘baby-ing.’ Tomorrow it will probably have a different name such as “adventures with the pain in the ass child” or “adventures in talking constantly without saying an intelligible word.” Today, she refused to eat her yogurt. It’s pretty tasty yogurt, the stonyfield farm organic variety with cereal in it. Who knows why, possibly because it’s not in finger food form. Or maybe she has been eating the same damn yogurt for three months since she stopped eating jarred baby food for no apparent reason. She’s such a jerk sometimes. I’m curious as to why I haven’t lost like 80 pounds in the last six months. I don’t think i have sat down for more than five minutes at a time during the 13 hours she’s awake. She won’t sit down to drink her milk or juice so i let her carry it around. If she gets quiet, it means that she’s trying to empty the “spill-proof” cup out onto my microfiber couch. FYI- those cups aren’t spill-proof. (I hate sippy cups. Why can’t they drink bottles till they’re like 5? who cares about crooked teeth? they’re just going to fall out anyway.) I constantly have to find her and take her cup away and put it on the table or counter. She’s such a stinker, i want to just smoosh her face sometimes.

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Filed under baby, brat, learning to talk, toddler

Olivia is the best baby ever

fun with babyGod, that is so not true. For instance, i’m in here not paying much attention to her (great mommy skills, i get it) and suddenly it goes quiet in the LR. I lean backwards to look. The TV is off. I get up to see why and she starts running behind the couch, which we moved forward a couple feet for the purpose of her running behind it. She has the remote. Next starts a tug of war which i nearly lose due to her freakishly powerful upper body strength. She screams something at me which sounds kind of like ‘omma cot iggoo!!’ and cries until she realizes I’m not giving it back, then goes about her business of trying to pull the humidifier off the end table. She figured out months ago how to turn the TV off by the button on the front so now she’s doing that. Whatever. The dr. said to get her off bottles and formula so I’m trying like hell to wean her from the two. I ended up just cutting her off cold turkey. I haven’t gotten much protesting since i replaced her formula with Horizon organic milk (she wouldn’t touch soy milk even though she had soy formula) with a little bit of Hershey’s syrup in it. I bought a bunch of disposable/recyclable cups and we’re good to go. So far.

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